April 21st, 2007- Lost Lake with the Zapins

As a person in his early 30s, I am seeing much transition in my life.

Part of the transition is that many of my friends are now married and starting to have families.

Having wandered on and off for the better part of a decade, my life has taken a different course than many of my peers.

Instead of a career, I've had a series of jobs to pay for my hikes.

I do not own a home, but have purchased a new shelter recently.

For the first time in over six years, I now own a vehicle.

And now that my friends are entering a different stage of life, their time is understandably limited.

As such, it it easier for me to work my schedule around their free time than the other way around.

On April 21st, I accompanied the Zapins (Marni, Josh, Avery and their dog Traveler) on a three mile hike to Lost Lake. Avery is almost 8 mos old now and is quite comfortable in his carrier. Josh and Marni want to make sure that the outdoors and the love of nature is large part of Avery's upbringing. I also feel honored when I tag along on these outings.

Marni and Josh are two of my closest friends in Boulder. What started off as a "fun run" one New Years Eve over 4 years ago has grown into a strong friendship. I've shared holidays with them, been to many awesome places and have had discussions that go beyond just spending time together on a hike or a run. After Avery was born, Marni and Josh started referring to me as "Uncle Mags". Truth be told, Avery has become an adopted "nephew" to me.

So, I was delighted to spend some time with them.

The hike was moderate, but always more challenging when a little one is on the hike. The hike was also a little more challenging due to the snow around the lake. No matter. The little guy enjoyed the hike. He was laughing and smiling (and sleeping!) . Here is a boy that will grow to love the outdoors.

The Zapin family at Lost Lake

After spending some time at the lake, flurries picked up. We headed down. Afterwards, we all headed to the Southern Sun for a brew and food.

Since going on this hike, I've been thinking. I will be 33 in a few weeks. Hardly old. But I am getting older.

I've made choices in my life . Choices that are not conventional. Because of these choices I have made, life is a lot different than I would have imagined since taking that first backpacking trip in 1996.

That trip was a watershed moment in my life. It lead to hiking the Appalachian Trail two years later. Doing the AT lead to me moving to Colorado and wanting to do other trails.

As I see my friends starting their own families, I think of the choices I made in my life. There is one choice that leads to me not taking that backpacking trip that weekend. I'm still in Rhode Island along with the rest of my (large) family. Another choice lead to not doing the PCT in 2002 and staying with the company I was working for at the time. I might be in Portland, OR now; making considerably more money but deep in the corporate world. And so on...

All choices that lead to somewhere different.

As I approach my mid-30s, I wonder what choices I may make now that will affect my future. Do I settle down a bit? Do I continue my wandering ways?

When I did the CDT last year, I could not help but think about the need for a community in my life...but still have this urge to wander and explore. I have yet to reconcile these very different, but equal, pulls in my life.

I enjoy the time spent with my friends. By spending time with my friends who now have a family, I am seeing what my life could have been like. It is not better or worse..but definitely different from the way my life is now.

All choices involve sacrifice. The key is to make the sacrifices that will make the life the most fulfilling for each individual. My question still remains for me: What sacrifices do I want to make and for what ends? The simple answer is: I still don't know.

All the photos (Many pics of the little guy! :D)